That beeping you’re hearing? You didn’t leave the oven on, and the smoke alarm has brand-new batteries.

It’s a telegram, here, just for you. And it’s not here to fill you in on the sinking of the Lusitania or an exciting new railway project.

No, this telegram is here to tell you about… Telegram: The messaging app just took a huge step into Web3 that could mean a “TON” of new developments for crypto.

Espresso Shots

☕️ Bitcoin’s Answer to Friend.tech

Last weekend, Bitcoin’s own Friend.tech-style social trading app called Alpha was launched.

Friend.tech is built on the Ethereum scaling network Base, while Alpha is built on the Bitcoin blockchain.

Alpha revolved around the trading of tokenized social assets and was built in just one weekend by its pseudonymous founder, Punk3700.

Despite the project’s incredibly quick production time, Punk3700 is confident in Alpha’s success.

Alpha will be “the next big leap in the world of social finance,” Punk3700 said in an interview with Decrypt, claiming that the project “aims to bring a luxurious and exclusive experience to social interactions.”

And we truly relate to Punk3700, when we’ve turned in projects we completed in a single weekend, we’ve always wished we had a secret identity.

☕️ Stanford Returns FTX Gifts

Stanford University is returning $5.5 million in gifts donated by the Bankman-Fried family.

Stanford has reportedly been in contact with FTX debtors and intends to return the funds directly to the bankrupt exchange.

Stanford’s decision comes after the news that FTX was suing the parents of Sam Bankman-Fried, alleging that they “fraudulently transferred and misappropriated funds.”

And until the news of Sam Bankman-Fried’s role in the collapse of FTX forced them to withdraw from the public, both of Bankman-Fried’s parents were professors at Stanford Law.

We’re glad that the funds are being returned, but now that the money is coming back from Stanford, it better not act like it’s better than us.

☕️ India Ranks 2nd in Crypto Volume

India has become the second-largest crypto market in the world, according to a recent report from Chainalysis.

"India leads the world in grassroots adoption as measured by our Global Crypto Adoption Index," the report reads, accounting for roughly $269 million in trading volume in India between July 2022 and June 2023. "Perhaps most impressive of all is that India’s emergence as a top cryptocurrency market comes in spite of a regulatory and tax environment that can be challenging for the industry to navigate."

And despite America’s equally unclear regulatory environment, the U.S. market is still the largest in crypto trading volume.

But we’re excited about India’s rise. India is outpacing other countries in crypto, and Bollywood is flourishing while Hollywood continues to strike.

If India dominates as a global superpower, we can look forward to a world where all food is more flavorful and every movie features tiger fights.

Spilling the Beans

Telegram Sends Crypto a Message 📞 

Telegram for you.

We hope this finds you well. (Stop). We have an exciting message. (Stop). About a huge development that could have major implications for crypto. (Stop).

Telegrams were once the go-to method for communication.

Now, if we’re hearing the tell-tale clicks of an incoming telegram, it’s because we’re watching a period piece and aliens are about to invade or Herman Mankiewicz’s latest draft of “Citizen Kane” is going to be late.

You had to pay extra for punctuation in telegrams, hence the telltale “stops.” It’s hard to imagine a telegram describing the money-face emoji, let alone how much it would cost to send a GIF of a spinning gorilla.

But there’s a modern Telegram, and it’s even more exciting than getting your oil news on the wire.

Telegram is a messenger app that has gained a solid, dedicated user base, growing to 800 million active users since its release in 2013.

It’s been likened to Whatsapp, the popular international messenger, but Telegram has several features that set it apart.

Perhaps foremost among them: you don’t need a phone number to access Telegram. Additionally, Telegram has security features such as encrypted “Secret Chats” and even an optional self-destruct timer for messages.

According to the Telegram homepage, Telegram is “a globally accessible freemium, cloud-based and centralized instant messaging service.”

But it might not be centralized for much longer.

Telegram has announced the release of a crypto wallet in collaboration with the Telegram Open Network (TON) a blockchain tech company founded by Telegram.

But this isn’t Telegram’s first foray into DeFi: Telegram was sued by the SEC in 2020 for its Initial Coin Offering, and subsequently abandoned its TON blockchain platform while continuing to develop TON’s offerings.

And that continued work has resulted in the release of Telegram’s self-custody crypto wallet. However, possibly because Telegram was burned by the SEC, the wallet won’t be available in the U.S.

Yes, there are already plenty of crypto wallets on the market, but the emergence of a communications giant into DeFi is cause for celebration.

And it’s already working out pretty well for TON. Toncoin (TON) jumped up to nearly $3 after Telegram’s wallet news went public, putting it among the top 10 cryptocurrencies.

Currently, crypto discourse primarily takes place on X, Reddit, and dedicated Discord servers, but Telegram’s push toward DeFi represents a step in the right direction.

As any marriage counselor will tell you, communication is key, and crypto’s communication is on the path toward a brighter future.

Once we’ve attained a consistent and clear communication protocol across Web3, all we’ll need is for the majority of crypto enthusiasts to get comfortable with prolonged eye contact, and then nothing will stop us.

Crypto 101

Yield Farm: Yield Farming is when you put your crypto or other digital assets on a DeFi platform with the intention of gaining or “farming” rewards.

The Last Sip

The Last Sip: We don’t understand why Punk3700 called his social trading platform “Alpha” when it certainly didn’t come first. Really missed the opportunity to call it “Best.Friend.Tech” implying that the platform has both a closer bond to you than Friend.tech, and that it’s allowed to call your parents by their first names.

Stay Caffeinated,

Coffee & Crypto Team

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