Throughout history, the hallowed halls of the Senate have been used to cook up all manner of dastardly plots.

From the assassination of Julius Caesar to turning Anakin Skywalker to the dark side, the Senate seems just as likely to pass motions as they are to develop nefarious schemes.

Now, one Senator has turned their gaze on crypto and everything hangs in the balance. Today, we’ll examine how this Senator plans to destroy crypto as we know it.

Espresso Shots

☕️ Ethereum’s Shanghai Upgrade 💻 ⬆️

It’s been announced that Ethereum will soon undergo the “Shanghai” upgrade.

What this means is that 18 million ETH, worth $31 billion, will be unlocked on the blockchain for the first time since December of 2020.

The unlocking of these funds, which had been staked for years, will also signify the end of Ethereum’s transformation to a proof-of-stake system.

In the short term, this could be bad for Ethereum prices as there will likely be a massive dump of ETH on the open market. This will no doubt cause some selling pressure.

But in the long run, this update will only increase Ethereum’s stability as an investment and attract more buyers, potentially triggering a bull run.

The Shanghai upgrade will eventually be followed by the Shanghai Noon upgrade and then the less popular, Shanghai Knights.

☕️ LayerZero Protocol Valued at $3 Billion 💰 ⛓️

LayerZero, a blockchain messaging protocol, has closed $120 million in Series B funding at a reported $3 billion valuation.

This is over a $2 billion increase from their previous valuation just a year ago.

And why? Because LayerZero is pioneering a revolutionary tech that will connect multiple different blockchains and allow them to speak to each other.

This secure blockchain messaging system could entirely change the way developers build applications, finally allowing them to use multiple chains to achieve a single purpose.

This tech sounds a bit like that rumored future we crypto nerds dream of: one where the average person uses crypto without ever even realizing their using it.

Think of it sort of like the quiet effectiveness of a Dyson fan or those little men inside the ATM who hand you your cash.

☕️ Binance Assists in Do-Kwon Case 🚨 ⚖️

South Korean law enforcement reached out to Binance asking them to freeze any assets that captured, international fugitive Do-Kwon may be holding on the exchange.

“We provided Korean authorities with the requested assistance,” said an official spokesperson for Binance. Adding that they couldn’t further comment on an ongoing investigation.

But this sort of preventative measure is standard operating procedure against suspects of financial crimes of this magnitude.

The frozen assets will prevent Do-Kwon from massive sell-offs or sketchily selling off and moving his money around before his day in court.

It's worth noting that while crypto is decentralized, Binance is a centralized exchange and they're subject to legal action and enforcement. Self custody wallets are entirely different.

Off the record, Binance has stated that it’s happy to help with the investigation but they’re getting, “too old for this shit,” and are, “about a month from retirement.”

Spilling the Beans

Elizabeth Warren's War on Crypto 😡

We’ve often called for more clarity from American politicians on where they stand on crypto.

But when they strongly, clearly come out as anti-crypto… well we really don’t like that.

And nobody has come out harder against crypto-currency than Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren.

The proud indigenous woman and once-presidential hopeful has railed against crypto at every chance she’s gotten.

To the point that when Politico wrote a headline suggesting that Warren was building an “anti-crypto army,” Warren liked the accusation so much that she cut up the video and used it as a promotional tool on her social media.

Warren’s not exactly establishing training camps and indoctrinating armed militia to destroy decentralized finance, but she certainly has a paper trail.

Warren, working in cooperation with seven other Democratic Senators, penned a series of six angry letters to six different crypto companies, taking them to task on their high energy use and broader effect on the climate.

But it’s not just Democrats. When it comes to Warren’s War on crypto, she’s not afraid to reach across the aisle.

Elizabeth Warren partnered with Republican Senator Roger Marshall of Kansas to introduce the Digital Asset Anti-Money Laundering Act of 2022, legislation which accused crypto of existing for nothing more than money laundering and terrorism.

Now, this is a shrewd political move by Warren.

Because by rendering crypto into a bipartisan issue it creates a narrative that crypto is such a threat to the nation that Republicans and Democrats can put aside their differences to stop it. She can also appoint herself as America's leading anti-crypto voice.

But political party is not a firm diving line in crypto to do with crypto. The blockchain congressional caucus is co-chaired by two Republicans and two Democrats.

Meanwhile there's countless pro crypto allies on both sides of the aisle. Nevertheless, crypto's loudest critics are nearly all liberals. And no one is louder than Warren.

On the right, Senator Ted Cruz and Governor Ron Desantis have been very vocally pro-crypto, and equally loud about the fact that they consider centralized digital currency unconstitutional.

Now, all of this chatter is causing some to say “Wow, looks like crypto has finally gotten politicized.”

But the thing is, crypto’s always been politicized.

Crypto has a clear ideology and political stance. It’s anti-big banks. Anti-big government. It’s all about power to the people.

Crypto is more practically Libertarian than anything else.

And it’s not that crypto has finally become politicized, it’s that politics have finally caught up. Crypto used to be something you could largely avoid in public policy.

That's no longer true. Crypto has pervaded American culture so deeply. Crypto has forced its way into the highest echelons of both corporations and the government.

And regardless of party affiliation, as we approach the next election cycle, anyone running is going to need to decide where they stand on crypto.

It’s going to be one of those hotly contested issues that politicians seem to decide on a case-to-case basis rather than on mere party lines.

We're seeing that change in real time as Joe Biden has gone from being completely silent on the issue to shifting more and more to an anti-crypto position.

For our part, seeing crypto policy out in the open is going to make things a whole lot easier. Especially when we’re deciding who to vote for.

And whatever fate befalls crypto in American politics, we’ll always know one thing for sure: we very much, deeply, do not ever want to get a beer with Elizabeth Warren.

Meme of the Day

Let the crypto hate flow through you.

Crypto 101

Series B Funding: Series B Funding is the second round of funding for a company that has passed certain milestones and moved beyond the startup phase of a company.

Using LayerZero as an example, they were valuated at $1 billion during their Series A funding, or initial fundraise when they were a startup. Now, at their Series B they’re valuated at $3 billion.

As a rule of thumb, investors will usually pay much more to throw their hat in the ring during Series B as the company has proven themselves. Series A is considered riskier.

The Last Sip

Here's three things that we’d rather do than go out for a beer with Elizabeth Warren:

• Pick up a handful of spiders.

• Attend Jury Duty.

• Shotgun a beer with Elizabeth Warren. (This way it would be fast and we’d at least get a nice buzz.)

Stay Caffeinated,

Coffee & Crypto Team

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