Many things are said of Elon Musk. But you don’t become a billionaire by accident.

Unless you’re born with billions, like Musk’s own kids, or the lost boys from “Succession.”

But has Musk run out of shrewd maneuvers? Will the man behind Tesla and SpaceX tank his fortune with progressively less-informed moves?

Maybe so, and here’s why: Musk was poised to leverage a crypto explosion of his own making. But it’s an opportunity he doesn’t seem to want.

Will the House of Musk rise, idle, or fall?

A Word Foam Our Sponsor

Hey, we advertise a couple of different newsletters here, including everything from Trad-Fi experts to AI reports. But today we’re throwing in our most exciting sponsor ever… ourselves!

That’s right. If you’ve enjoyed reading Coffee & Crypto, we thought you might be interested in the good stuff we keep in the back.

It’s a newsletter we’re calling “Premium Roast,” and it cuts through the nonsense floating around from Twitter and CNBC.

With Premium Roast, we’ll deliver hard-hitting analysis and guides to the markets directly to your inbox, three times a week, at a price point cheaper than an oat milk latte.

Espresso Shots

☕️ Microsoft Partners with Aptos 🪟 🤝 

Microsoft has unveiled a partnership with Aptos as the tech giant moves toward digital payments and tokenization.

Aptos is a Layer-1 blockchain, and for now, this collaboration seems primarily centered on AI and Web3 utility.

Aptos will use Microsoft AI to create a process that streamlines the onboarding process for new Web3 users, and helps developers build smart contracts and design DeFI applications.

And it’s already proved beneficial for Aptos. Using Microsoft’s AI, Aptos aims to roll out its new Aptos Assistant soon.

Though unfortunately, because of Microsoft’s stringent brand enforcement, the Aptos Assistant will look and sound just like Master Chief from “Halo.”

☕️ SBF Will Face Campaign Finance Charges 🇺🇸 ⚖

Last month, U.S. prosecutors announced they’d drop one of Sam Bankman-Fried’s political donation charges due to the American extradition treaty with the Bahamas. But SBF will still face campaign finance charges.

While the dropped charge only accounted for one of the eight charges against SBF, the DOJ has said his political donations will still be considered evidence under his wire fraud charge.

“The defendant’s use of customer deposits to conduct a political influence campaign was part of the wire fraud scheme charged in the original indictment. And as part of the originally charged money laundering scheme, the defendant also concealed the source of his fraudulent proceeds through political straw donations.” U.S. Attorney Damian William wrote in a notice to the presiding judge.

When asked why the DOJ would use evidence from a dropped charge against SBF, prosecutors cited the ancient legal statute of “get rekt.”

☕️ The Pope on AI 😇 🤖

Pope Francis took the time to address concerns about AI in an official statement from the Vatican.

“Artificial Intelligence and Peace” is the title of the upcoming homily that will be delivered by the Pope on September 21, according to a Tuesday press release from The Vatican.

“[Pope Francis] recalls the need to be vigilant and to work so that a logic of violence and discrimination does not take root in the production and use of such devices, at the expense of the most fragile and excluded: injustice and inequalities fuel conflicts and antagonisms,” read an excerpt from the Vatican’s release regarding the September homily. “The urgent need to orient the concept and use of artificial intelligence in a responsible way, so that it may be at the service of humanity and the protection of our common home”.

And remember everyone, a sermon is formal. A homily is informal. So onstage the Pope will be allowed to smoke, play with the mic stand, and do crowd work.

Spilling the Beans

Elon Musk Says 'Never' to Crypto ❌ 🤬

If you’re like us, you reacted to the news that Elon Musk was rebranding Twitter to “X” with a mixture of surprise, annoyance, and amusement.

But you’re probably not as annoyed as we are, because we write a newsletter.

And if you haven’t noticed, most major news sources are now writing “X (formerly Twitter)” whenever we have to write about the social media platform with the bluebirds because none of us are convinced that this name change is really going to stick.

But regardless of whether the name change is permanent, “X” is already making major waves across crypto.

The rebrand gave rise to countless copycat tokens and crap-coins hoping to make a quick buck off the tumult around Twitter (currently X).

And the proliferation of these rug-pull scams was so bad that users were taking to X (formerly Twitter) to warn investors of the fraudulent Musk tokens.

Which prompted Musk himself to respond:

And this seems like a stern response from a man who considers every possibility, from space travel to an underground highway.

So, what soured Musk on crypto? Or more precisely, what soured Musk on developing his own?

There are two major factors to consider.

First, there is Musk’s strange and eventful relationship with Dogecoin. Musk has been called the “Dogefather,” and the behavior of the memecoin has become linked with Musk’s online commentary.

It goes like this: Musk is parodied on SNL. Dogecoin surges. Then Musk says AI entities will be humanity’s babysitters. Dogecoin surges again.

But some believe this relationship is far from innocent and that’s resulted in an ongoing, $258-billion lawsuit alleging that Musk’s relationship with Dogecoin is tantamount to insider trading.

So, the litigation stemming from Musk’s petcoin may be enough to keep him from fully embracing crypto.

But even with PayPal releasing a stablecoin, it would seem like a prime opportunity to release a native token for X (formerly Twitter).

While we have no doubt that more brands will follow this trend, Musk has already considered crypto payment utility for X (formerly Twitter).

But a central part of Musk’s vision for his platform is to turn X (formerly Twitter) into a “digital town square” where all opinions and voices are treated equally, without fear of retribution.

But it hardly becomes an unbiased platform when that town square is touting its own, native token. When currency is introduced, power inevitably shifts.

So will Musk eventually roll out his own crypto? Who knows. If anything, Musk is consistently unpredictable.

But for now, it seems that the only “X” Elon Musk is really focused on is maintaining a civil environment with his former girlfriend Grimes, with which he co-parents their cosmic offspring.

Premium Market Report

Tether's Q2 Sees Excess Reserves Climb, Profits Slide to $850M
Source: TheBlock + CoinDesk

📃 Summary:

Meme of the Day

Entertained? Yes. Impressed? No. Deeply confused? Absolutely.

Crypto 101

Aptos: A layer-1 blockchain created by former Meta employees.

A layer-1 blockchain is the foundational, first “layer” of the blockchain. Therefore, Layer 1 provides the most essential services, like ensuring security and recording transactions on a public ledger.

The Last Sip

The Pope will discuss concerns about AI regulation in a homily this September. Here are our most anticipated takes.

3. Only God can create new intelligence that’s capable of sin.

2. If you use ChatGPT to do your homework, you’re going to hell. Period.

1. If you used AI to generate an image of the Pope in a puffer coat, you’re going to double hell.

Stay Caffeinated,

Coffee & Crypto Team

That's all for today! If this email got you hooked on our unhinged crypto takes, be sure to get a full dose on Twitter @GetCoffeeCrypto.

Want cutting-edge market analysis delivered to your inbox three times a week? Sign up for Premium Roast! We'll cut through the BS floating around on Twitter and CNBC and help you finally understand the markets, all for the price of a single cup of coffee.

If you find yourself smiling at any of our dumb jokes, or even *learning* something - make sure to share this newsletter with your friends!

If you get 5 friends to sign up - or even enemies, we don't care - we'll send you our Bitcoin Bootcamp Ebook! This thing is packed with info and is the ultimate guide to the world’s ultimate currency.

Just hit the Click to Share button in the section below to get started!

DISCLAIMER: None of this is financial advice. This newsletter is strictly educational and is not investment advice or a solicitation to buy or sell any assets or to make any financial decisions. Please be careful and do your own research.