Optimism can be draining. It can be annoying. Sometimes you just want to tell those glass-half-full people to quiet down and struggle through Monday morning with the rest of us.

But some new developments with Bitcoin have us feeling pretty optimistic. And we’re not talking glass half-full, we’re talking glass half-bull.

That’s right, we’ve drunk the Kool-Aid, cause we’re fully convinced that nothing can slow crypto’s stride as the bull market rages onward and upwards.

Don’t believe us? Well, get ready to take a long, refreshing sip of that half-full glass, with a bit of our caffeine-infused mania on the side.

Espresso Shots

☕️ Crypto Sounds Off in the Comments 💻 🤬 

As the IRS meets to discuss its new proposal for crypto tax regulations, it will have to address 120,000 comments from concerned crypto advocates.

The most controversial aspect of the new proposal is how the legislation defines “broker” and which individuals and entities would need to comply with the new disclosures.

Many of the comments the IRS will be forced to sift through may have been beefed up and bolstered by AI, such as the ongoing effort from LeCpunK Army’s “Treasury Raid.”

If only the Vikings knew that a real raid was made up of 120,000 chatbot-guided comments, they wouldn’t have needed to waste all those centuries bothering seaside villages.

☕️ Bitcoin to $69k Next Year? 🚀 🌙

The prediction sounds beyond bullish, but it could be possible as Bitcoin enters its “acceleration phase,” as Cory Mitchell, an analyst at Trading.biz, told CoinDesk.

“Bitcoin uptrends tend to move quickly once they get going, moving hundreds of percent often in less than a year,” said Mitchell. “This is called the acceleration phase.”

Though a near 88% increase from Bitcoin’s current price of $36,756 seems steep, there are certainly some historical precedents.

"In 2013, bitcoin rallied 1200% in approximately 100 days; in 2017, it rallied 1900% in just under a year; in late 2020, it rallied 400% in about 140 days,” Mitchell continued.

As to why the analysts at Trading.biz predicted $69,000 instead of rounding up to $70,000… we tried to ask them and they just giggled.

☕️ Bithumb’s IPO 👍 📈

The Korean exchange Bithumb is preparing to launch an initial public offering in the latter half of 2025, according to reporting from the Block.

Bithumb has also tapped Samsung Securities as the underwriter for the IPO.

Bithumb was embroiled in controversy when Lee Jeong-Hoon, the former chairman of the exchange, was accused of fraud, but Jeong-Hoon was found not guilty in 2018. He has since returned to Bithumb as a registered director on the board of the exchange.

As Bithumb goes public, it could reignite the Korean crypto market. But perhaps more dangerously, it could also be the catalyst that begins the thumb wars.

Polled Brew

Spilling the Beans

Don’t Worry, Be Bullish 😤 👍

There are countless reasons to get married: A partner for life, the desire to procreate, or a strategic alliance to gain political power.

We’d all like to think that love beats out every other reason, but that’s often not the case.

Most people get married for the first time, not because they’ve met their soulmate, but because that’s the person they’re dating at that juncture of their early 30s.

When you’ve been together for a certain number of years, getting married is actually the path of least resistance.

What’re you gonna do? Break up, divide up all your shit, and re-enter the dating pool?

No, you’ve memorized all of each other’s take-out orders, so it looks like we’re in this for the long haul.

And crypto and traditional finance seem to be in the same situation. 

They’ve been playing “Will They Won’t They” for fifteen years, there was talk of a Decoupling, but it looks like it’s time for TradFi to put a ring on crypto.

And it turns out this union… may be a really good thing for the current bull market.

Because crypto is on its way up and with the crypto market’s current marriage to the traditional economy, there are no signs of stopping.

Last Friday, the US Bureau of Labor Statistics released its nonfarm payroll data.

Unemployment is down to 3.9%, which is slightly better than America’s average 4 to 6%, but job creation and wage growth have both slowed.

These trends usually indicate a decline in stock market volatility, which bodes well for future crypto price corrections.

Upon reviewing Friday’s payroll data, Greg Magadini, director of derivatives at Amerdata, claimed “There’s no reason not to be bullish BTC”, according to reporting from CoinDesk.

“This NFP print was also accompanied by revisions lower for both September (+336k→ +297k) and August (+227k → +165k). We’re also seeing decent progress on the CPI and hourly earnings trends, giving room for the Fed to speak in a continued dovish tone,” Magadini continued.

Meanwhile, despite the recent public shaming of one of crypto’s biggest villains, Crypto markets are only climbing right now.

Yes, experts agree that there are sunny skies ahead for the nuptials between traditional finance and the rising crypto market.

We wish them only health and happiness, if you need us, we’ll be frantically scanning their wedding registry for the cheapest possible gift. 

Crypto 101

Dovish: You’re probably already familiar with bullish and bearish outlooks, but a dovish outlook is one that favors low rates over everything.

A dove is more interested in a low unemployment rate than keeping inflation low.

Dovish and its opposite, “hawkish” are usually used in relation to high vs. low Fed interest rates.

The Last Sip

The Last Sip: Not to be outdone by Trading.biz’s prediction of BTC at $69,000 in 2024, amateur analysts on Discord are predicting Bitcoin at $420,000 by April 20, 2024.

Stay Caffeinated,

Coffee & Crypto Team

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DISCLAIMER: None of this is financial advice. This newsletter is strictly educational and is not investment advice or a solicitation to buy or sell any assets or to make any financial decisions. Please be careful and do your own research.